MuckFlash

Cape Town, ZA -5 March 2009- Staff. A group of South African entrepreneurs has decided to fight the global economic downturn with an innovative new tourist attraction. Even as jobs and capital continue to disappear around the globe, The Shellfin Company Limited, as they’ve dubbed their new venture, will seek to reinvigorate South Africa’s flagging tourist industry with an ambitious, and costly, circus comprised mainly of rare trained mollusks.

Edwin Mienfer, the acting CEO of the new company, is brashly optimistic about his chances. “Sure tourism’s a flooded market with lots of cheap inventory, but if you have a differentiated item of high quality, people just can’t fail to notice. Mollusk Mountain will be huge,” he said.

Mollusks include all known gastropods and cephalopods, which range from snails and clams to squid and octopus, some of which are highly intelligent and capable of learning some simple tricks. Mollusks also have firm place in the fishing industry as well as popular culture landmarks like Jules Verne’s 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. Despite their maritime and literary abundance, however, this is likely the first time Mollusks have been used exclusive as a mode of entertainment.

“It will be absolutely unique under the sun,” says Mienfer. “Not only will you have the trained cephalopods performing astounding feats in the center ring, but there’s a whole range of clam tosses, mussel murals and snail races. And we haven’t even begun to get into the merchandising aspect.”

Despite some initial misgivings, Mienfer says that several investors have already provided the necessary funding to build out stage one of the project, and they will soon break ground on a two acre site just outside of Cape Town. Attractions will include more traditional theme park rides as well as carnival games, refreshments and live shows. The most compelling portion, however, is likely the specialized creatures that Mienfer and his team have spent months grooming and conditioning. In total, Phase I is likely to cost tens of millions of dollars, with four more development phases of equal or greater scale planned over the next five years.

“I can’t ruin the magic and tell you what the tricks are before opening day,” quipped a coy Mienfer, “but I can tell you that you will doubtlessly see things you never thought an Arctic Furred Clam could do. And the Squid floor show will blow your mind.” Mienfer refused to elaborate further on future attractions. “You’ll just have to come see, wont’ you?” he said.

While it may not be the savior of the local economy, where unemployment has reached nearly 20% recently, it appears that at minimum the mollusk circus be in town to do its small part to aid in the recovery.